A group of Hungarian Vlach Gypsies sit in a circle. One of them sings while the others loudly interrupt him with questions and doubts about whether his song tells the truth. They are all men; women are generally not allowed to participate. <br><br>This seemingly odd ritual is <em>mulatśago</em>, a festival of drink, competitive song and social bonding, in an environment safe from everyday conflict, practised by Vlach Gypsy men. The social rules are known by all, the most important being that one can only sing “the truth”, which others can question upfront.<br><br>The truth, however, is mostly restricted to demonstrating the singer’s claim to being a “true Rom”: one who spends his money bonding with his brothers. His songs, therefore, are not about the positive aspects of life, such as love or wealth, but rather his sorrow at forsaking his family to drink and sing with the men.<sup>1</sup><br><br>Women are excluded from <em>mulatśago</em>. Their singing has a different function: they sing “short stories” to children until they are old enough to join the men, a form of singing typically viewed to be of lower status.<sup>2</sup> Women are generally not allowed to sing with men, interrupt or express strong opinions, at the risk of being disrespected.<sup>3</sup><br><br>Singing, then, becomes an act for men to bond. The “truth” they tell in their songs is their own truth, helping them become true Rom. But for women, it perpetuates inequality since it is men who dictate what is legitimate speech and what is not.<sup>4</sup><br>